poetry for idiots

I’ve got a pile a carpets on me drive
they’ve been there quite a while
can’t deny
The bin men came on through
and offered something to do
with the carpets – but I’m not Brian and he’s the one that booked them.

I really must be daft sometimes it’s true
but honesty’s the way I go
right through
I’ll book it right
probably wait at least a fortnight
and then the same bloke’ll come back and think I’m a complete nutjob!

The filing cabinets* are calling from the lounge
what a faff
but at least I had no need to scrounge
some help from someone practical minded
who wouldn’t make the job long-winded
and who probably wouldn’t have used the instructions which make about as much sense upside down.

*Bought a pair of cabinets from Tesco Direct
They came in nice flat boxes
for me to erect
Be nice when the papers and boxes and files
are in their new homes instead of in piles
all over the place – but blimey, I wish I’d had whole filing cabinets delivered because I’m sick of trying to put them together.

I’m gonna get a cup of tea now.